Amy : VBS - Day 5 (and my testimony)

Today was our last day of VBS - the kids came in and I think I could sense that they were more excited and seemed to have more energy than on the other days. We also had two new kids today - two girls. Our number was up to 21 today. Last night we talked about giving the shepherds some time to talk to their kids about accepting Christ, what it means and how they can do it. So today, whenever the kids were done with their craft or with the Bible story, the shepherds took time to talk with their kids and invite them to join Jesus' family.

As Ev mentioned in her post yesterday, I was asked to share my testimony at the very end of today's program. I'm like Bob - I don't like to speak in front of people so this would be completely out of my comfort zone. But I remember that Pastor Nancy told me at the airport that being on missions is essentially making yourself available to be used by God 100% of the time. Whatever You want me to do, God, I agree to it even before I know what You will be asking me to do. So I said sure and then i spent the rest of the day yesterday thinking and praying about what to share. The testimony I had created and shared with the team before we left for Japan was actually rather artificial (sorry team). There is more to my faith story than just becoming a prodigal daughter. But I questioned whether a child would be able to understand. A friend of mine however, shared with me that kids know and understand more these days than we give them credit for. So I decided to go for it and share something that was rather difficult for me to share.

At the end of VBS today, the kids were coming into the community center after having spent the past 30 minutes running around outside. As they all piled into the room, it was apparent that they were full of energy. I looked at them and thought that there was no way, NO WAY that these kids would be able to sit through my testimony. This past week, I have noticed that the kids have a hard time focusing on the front of the room. After a few sentences of speaking, their attention will wander - they will stare at the ground, or whisper to each other, or fidget with something. I really wasn't sure what God was going to do with my testimony but I had decided already that i would do it so I decided there would be no turning back. I've also decided to share it with you now - it's so much easier to type it down than to say it to you in person... :)

Testimony Start
I began by telling the kids that I grew up in the church and how I remember my Sunday school teacher telling me that Jesus was my friend and that I should obey His commands. So i listened to my parents and studied hard and got good grades. Sometimes though, I would fight with my sisters. < at this point, i looked into the crowd of kids and I was amazed to see that every pair of eyes was on me, every ear was listening. It was so still and quiet - i was so shocked that I actually lost my train of thought and had a moment of awkward pause. > My family used to be very independent, we would never talk about our feelings. When I was 11, my mom had another baby - I had a new brother! All of us loved him VERY much - he brought our family closer together. When he was 4 years old, he got very sick. I was sad and prayed to God that He would heal him. but when he was 9 years old, God decided to take him to heaven. I got angry at God for not answering my prayer. I decided to stop reading the bible and I stopped praying. I tried to talk to friends but they didn't understand. I had two sister who understood though. my sister asked me - do you pray? do you read your bible? Jesus is your friend. He will listen to you - you can talk to Him. So i started to read the bible again, and I started to pray. I could feel God comforting me in His arms. I dont know why my brother was sick, or why God decided to take him to heaven so early, but i know that he made my family closer together and closer to Jesus. So when you are sad or lonely or bad things happen, I hope you will remember that Jesus is your friend too. He will listen to your prayers and He will never leave you.
Testimony End

It has been almost 7 years since my brother has gone to heaven. The experience of losing a young loved one actually left me scarred for many years. I never thought I would re-enter children's ministry because I didn't think i would be able to allow myself to love children again. Through small steps of faith, I have found healing through Jesus and have decided that it is better to love and lost than to have never loved at all. Now, here I am in Japan - I believe that God has used this trip not only to change the lives of the Japanese children but also my heart as well. Thank you so much for all your support and prayers.